Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Hard days....

I really wonder, that what we do for our children, is the best. I mean to continually leave your child upset at pre-school feels so wrong. Jonah had the hardest time settling into his kinder all those years ago. And then school. I know it will change, I know it will be better. But geez I was never going to be that mother....

Our kids were going to be well adjusted, free spirited and happy.

Life is always throwing challenges at you, hard ones too. Really hard ones.

Ones that throw your past back at you, ones that catch you on your blind side and ones that are just tragic.

All I can do is be me, all I can do is trust me, all I can do, is be better and stronger and wiser and honest.

Be the truth of yourself. 

I will never stop being the carers of these souls, sure they will grow and change.
But I will always be here, through all the challenges.

When they need me.... 

But some they have to walk themselves.
And that hurts.


  1. do you remember ( i'm sure you could never forgot) when we gave you that mothers day fridge magnet??

    a mother is not just someone who gives birth to a child ...
    a mother is someone who loves unconditionally, who guides a path in life, who gives advice when it is needed and listens when it is not, who trusts and is trusted, who respects and is respected.

    i was lucky in life to have you in my life, an extra heart, an extra mind and a very beautiful soul.

    i will never forgot giving you that magnet and all those things are still true in my heart.

    you are a wonderful mother and a wonderful person. every decision you make you have a truth behind it, a reason for that choice and your children trust you.

    don't ever doubt yourself. any mistakes you ever make will be forgiven

    love you so much xx

    1. And of course I remember it, it was lovely and thoughtful. I still have it. xx

      ( also, I am always in awe at how kind and loving you and cassie are and that you accepted me into your life so lovingly. xxooo)

  2. Awwwwwwww Lutey, you make me weep. Xxxxxxxx you and your big Sis are special little souls. Will always be here for you too. Thankyou so much.

  3. Dear Rex being a mom is the hardest, most gut wrenching job we will ever do. I love being a mom more than anything else in life - my husband and I agree that we must always love our children first (not always a popular viewpoint - but that's how much we love them). Sometimes the pain of what they have to go through is almost too much to bear - but we love them through it. Your children are lucky to have a mom like you - someone to care for their physical needs, to play with them and make them laugh, but most importantly someone that gently cares for their souls.

    1. That is so sweet Clare. I think to love children first, is to love yourself too. Because ultimately you can't love others if you don't love yourself.

  4. I love this post because while the pain of love is palpable where children are concerned and yet the greatest gift is to give them freedom to explore and discover this world

  5. Yes, and that is, what love is. To give freedom.

  6. It does, Rex. It really, really, really hurts. But I guess it is their life to live at the end of the day and we can only prepare them as best we can. Some settle in well quickly, others take longer. School is a small part of a life, but an important one. If we help them dodge reality so young, what will we do when they are older?

    Your kids are lucky they have such a loving, caring, 100% committed mother to fall back on. Easy does it. Gentle and kind. But do it they must. I think anyway. I know many would disagree and that's okay.


  7. Thanks Maxabella, I agree that children need to walk their paths too. I suppose, reality is hard too.

    She loves it when she's there, and her feelings of angst are short lived, my mum says she's building stranger awareness to trust who's there to care for her. She says, it's healthy.

  8. We need darkness to appreciate light . Come rest your head on my pillow and share your dreams with me.

    x Wayne.