Friday, July 15, 2011

A casserole full of kindness, bravery and despair.

A women came to our house last night with a casserole in her hand. It was to pass on to my cousin in her time of despair.

How long does despair last?

The women came with her own broken heart, with tears in her own eyes, with a hole in her own heart and with a moutain of despair.

So brave. So beautiful. So lost in her own despair.

As the tears rolled down her face, and her grief washed over us, we told her she was kind and brave and that we were overwhelmed how a person can be so kind while living in their own heartache.

How long does despair last?

She said she had been running from it, but that you can't run from something that has not left you.

She was brave enough to come to Gilby's funeral, she was brave enough to come out here at night to pass on her casserole as a sign of her thoughts for others. Because she does not go anywhere any more.

We will take this casserole to Sharon today, and hope it passes on the bravery and kindness of her. The despair will have to be shared, and in doing so hopefully lift some of it off the shoulders of these women. To share the grief, to allow it to be apart of others and be apart of you, maybe their is some release in this.

This women lost her eldest son in a tragic accident just over a year ago, when he was just 21.

We should never forget to share our grief, to share our pain, to share our lives, our thoughts, our love, our hope.

Despair has no time. It just is.


  1. i'm sure that this was not easy to write - the grief is raw, your words are filled with pain for the suffering of those close to you and your own grief. there is nothing easy about this aspect of life - to feel that despair, the loss - to wonder if your heart will return to the place it was before the loss. we are never the same - and in a way that seems to be okay after awhile, i think.

  2. Very beautiful to share. Kindness is such an overwhelmingly simple thing to offer the world. So affecting and transformative in tiny ways even during the blackest of times. I think of the woman and her son, and her courage and kindness.

  3. I am sorry for all the pain. I cannot imagine...Thank you for sharing. I am sure that is part of the healing process for all of you. How do you ever fully heal from these tragic events?

  4. Wonderful to honour the grief and mourning, giving tribute to these women and their family and friends. Val

  5. My heart aches for you when I read your words. And there are tears. I understand. There is something in this kind of grief that reaches out to our experience with the loss of someone we love. I think it's beautiful when someone, like the woman you write above, does brave her own grief, her own aching heart, to reach out to someone knowing the pain they are going through.
    Blessed be

  6. Thank you all for your lovely words. It is wonderful to see such kindness from people all over the world. My cousin was touched by the other women's kindness, and to know a casserole can be a gesture of this, is a beautiful thing.

  7. Oh my goodness. You are a beautiful Soul. Love to you, and your cousin. xo